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82 Movie Reviews

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Extremely short, to the point

Apparently this author wants you to suck his dick. And based on my previous review being deleted, he also has no spine.

No, really. Sit through all three intros, and see what the actual movie is. You'll see my comments above are quite accurate.

Berenstein Bears

Fine, mark this abusive too. Berenstein Bears. That's all this is. Berenstein Bears. No, the stock Star Syndicate intros and loader don't count. Berenstein Bears. Other NG users viewing this are not missing much. Berenstein Bears. I'm being insightful by letting others know what they will be rewarded with after sitting through all the stock intros. Berenstein Bears. Sorry if the truth hurts. Berenstein Bears.

Now stop making Dailytoons, you're obviously out of ideas and out of worthwhile material to showcase. Come back when you have something to showcase that's worth people's time to watch.

[don't let the 1 minute of intros fool you, sit and watch it to the end before you delete this post as hateful and irrelevent]

TheStarSyndicate responds:

What's wrong with Berenstein Bears? I don't see the problem here.

There you go!

A Pube Muppet animation with actual animation! And something more than just a long monologue! Backgrounds have some animation, objects move, there's more than one scene, there's a story line... Good job!

If Pube Muppet had started out on NG this way in the first place, he probably would've gotten a better reputation instead of NG users using him as a cheap excuse to make crappy flash movies, and the humorous anti-PM movie I made wouldn't have needed that little rant at the end :P

Not worthwhile

This has background music and a looping motion tween. A worthwhile flash movie has a story, animation...

you know what I'm not going to waste my time repeating myself you obviously don't intend to submit anything other than 5-minute motion tween MP3 music wonders called "ducktails" so I'm not even going to show any compassion or mercy for your artistic wonder. I'm just going to vote zero, and that's that. And I advise anyone else about to click the Review button to simply not waste their time, this author doesn't care.

I'm not saying this just to be a jerk, every episode of "Ducktails" from this author is just as bad. A song, a motion tween, and that's it. It's kind of hard to write something constructive to an author that clearly doesn't care. I see the Kitty Krew put more effort into "Pikachu Surfing" than this, and that series is little more than crude brush drawings, speakonia and motion tweening Pokemon GIFs to tell some kind of nonsensical story one microsecond at a time. Yes, that right: you are JUST AS BAD as the Kitty Krew. Hurts, doesn't it?

I'm going to tell you the same thing I tell the Kitty Krew: This is Newgrounds.com, a site for Flash movies that are interesting, new, creative, or worthwhile to keep. This is NOT a kitty litter box. This is NOT a public toilet. This is not a site for you to just make up shit and throw it to see if it sticks to the wall. If you can't come up with something worthwhile to watch here, then don't submit anything at all. Stop wasting people's time and bandwidth. Thank you.

livelavalive responds:

im hurt

Junk

Worthwhile Flash portal content involves a story, animation, something interesting that prevents NG users from voting zero.

A smily face against the backdrop of a glitched out JPEG with overmodulated 80's music doesn't count.

Now give up and stop making Ducktails flash movies.

Well not quite...

"this episode is about space and time warps"

More like a waste of the time and space continuum. All you did was animate a very slow rotate into a spiral. Well, what was the point of that exactly? The overall feeling is kind of slow, creepy, and spaced out, I'll give you that. But I have to ask, so far, what is the point of this whole series? Each episode so far has been a song, some background, and a motion tween. That's it. The series so far has been utter junk. The Kitty Krew puts more effort into their Pikachu Surfing series than this, and that's not really much effort at all. Know what I mean?

And speaking of bad Flash animation, what the hell are you doing in your title screen that makes Flash run so slooowwwww with only a few images? I have a fairly beefy computer and the animation isn't able to finish in time with your intro music.

livelavalive responds:

what

Well, this isn't anything interesting

Once you sit and let all the intros roll by, it's basically spam for a vibrator (real or not). This doesn't belong here on the Portal.

I honestly liked the Dailytoons the way they used to be when you guys started it off in 2006: some of it was crap but at least there was more than just one piece of junk and there was some actual effort put into it. It's like you guys are out of ideas. Frankly, I think it's time to stop the DailyToons until you have some worthwhile stuff to post. It's either that, or continue doing crap DailyToons and gain an infamous reputation for spam like the Kitty Krew has now.

There is only one thing interesting about this

None of the animations are interesting or even show any sign of effort. They all look like something thrown together in about 5-10 minutes. SO let me ask about the only thing you caught my interest in... what retro videogame did you get that music from?

TheStarSyndicate responds:

For your information, BUDDY, that intro/menu music was a composition I created specifically for the funeral of one of my good friends. It took a lot of energy out of me and was perhaps the single most stressful process I have gone through in my entire life. This was no "videogame".

Fuck you.

Even as someone who generally likes weird shit

I have to ask: What the hell was THAT?!?

Is this one of those "come away with your own interpretation" artistic pieces?

Age 43, Male

Joined on 3/29/03

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